Maybe it’s just me.
Maybe I’m the only person who sometimes allows other people to bring me down.
Has something like this ever happened to you?
You start out in the morning feeling great. You set your intention to have a great day and allow this feeling to continue all day long.
Then you run into that guy or gal. You know the one. The dude or dudette who always sucks the air outta the room.
Maybe it’s even someone with whom you cohabitate.
Then they say or do something that rubs you the wrong way. (Like they always seem to do.) And just like a pin to a balloon, there goes your good mood.
Does that ever happen to you?
I’m not gonna lie to ya. I can’t say that I’ve mastered feeling good regardless of circumstances… and/or the influence negative people. But I sure am a heckuva lot better than in years past.
Mostly because I’ve discovered a secret. And that secret is THIS:
How I feel is solely up to me.
Because I am 100% in control of my mind.
Negative people can only make me feel bad if I allow them.
And if YOU would also like to feel happy even when you’re around miserable people, allow me to share a few things. Stuff I’ve learned from visiting this planet over the past half a century and having a lot of different experiences… with a lot of different people.
You see, there’s an inescapable fact in this physical world. You can’t have a physical experience until you’ve created it first in thought.
This ain’t no woo-woo “sit on your ass and the universe will rain money” B.S.
And I can prove it.
As a matter of fact, quantum physics has proven it.
You can go DEEP down that rabbit hole if ya want (that’s what I did.) But if you just want the Readers Digest version, here it is:
You never actually experience a world “out there.” All you TRULY experience is your own nervous system.
This is a physiological FACT.
A brief sidetrack:
I’d LOVE to go deeper into this topic with you. In fact, I’ve been considering it. I’ve been thinking about publishing some materials on this topic… and possibly doing a YouTube channel, too.
But not just useless theory. I’d like to share how you can apply this stuff to your life so you can create more happiness, more success… and if you’re one of them, there greedy capitalists, more money.
Is that something you’d be interested in? If so, click the “contact me” link above and let me know.
Here’s what I do when something, or most likely SOMEONE starts to piss me off or make me feel bad.
First of all, here’s what I used to do:
I used to try and monitor my thoughts. But seeing as how we have 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day, that’s pretty much impossible.
BTW, of those thousands of thoughts, 80% are negative. And 95% are exactly the same repetitive thoughts as the day before. So is it any wonder that things almost NEVER change or get better for the majority of folks?
Anyhoo, that’s why I rarely try to monitor my thoughts anymore. It’s like trying to catch a gnat in a tornado.
Nowadays I monitor my FEELINGS. Because feelings are an accurate indicator of my thoughts. Because I’ve discovered that my thoughts create my feelings. And my feelings affect my actions.
Make sense? Still with me?
That’s why when I feel uplifted, I make a mental note — and sometimes a physical note on paper — about that which uplifts me. That way I can remember it. Then, when I specifically want to feel uplifted, I use that as a ‘touchstone’ to my happiness.
You see, I’ve discovered that I can be happy under all conditions if I’m clear enough and strong enough in directing my attention to what I want. Which, in this example, is happiness.
Sure, simple in theory. Not always easy though.
So I’m not gonna lie to ya. It is more difficult to remain happy or positive when you’re surrounded by people who are unhappy, negative and hateful.
But here’s the thang…
While you might have an experience that only lasts maybe five or ten minutes… and while that experience might be unpleasant and uncomfortable… the majority of your negative emotions don’t come from the few minutes of that negative experience. They come from all the hours you spend ruminating on it inside your noggin AFTER the experience.
I’ve been a MASTER of that my entire life. And I can tell ya from LOTS of experience, it just makes EVERYTHING suck.
But here’s the GOOD news:
The majority of your negative emotions can be eliminated if you invest some ‘alone time’ focusing on what you want instead of thinking about the negative person/event. (This is when I think about my “touchstone” thangs I told you about a minute ago.)
In other words, my experience has shown that it’s of BIG TIME value for you to give your conscious attention to what you want. Which, in this case is to feel good. Otherwise, you can be pretty easily swept up by the influence of people and circumstances which surround you.
This way, YOU are determining the thoughts that are important to you. Instead of allowing yourself to be stimulated by another’s thoughts that may or may not be what you want.
Oh, one more thang:
I’ve found it useless to try to erase those negative thoughts. Because whatever you resist becomes stronger.
Or in the worst case, that which you fight, you become.
So rather than trying to erase the past, focus on the present. Give thought to what you want NOW.
In extremely negative situations, if you still feel bad after doing all this stuff, try this:
Rather than trying to change your thoughts, distract yourself.
In other words, go take a nap, watch a movie, listen to music, snuggle with your dog… do something that will change your thoughts by distracting you from the negative.
Look, everyone has the right to be, do or have whatever they want. And there are times when you allow their actions to affect you… and it makes you feel bad. That’s normal. You’re human.
However, you also have the right to be, do or have whatever YOU want.
And THAT, my revered reader, is the secret to being happy even when you’re around miserable people.
All the best,
P.S. One last thang about being happy…
Although it shouldn’t be this way, I’ve discovered something about myself. And I bet YOU feel the same way, too…
It’s a lot more difficult to be happy if I don’t have a predictable, dependable and somewhat significant ‘stream of wealth.’
After all my entrepreneurial struggles and successes over the past three decades, I’ve discovered that the very BEST way to create that predictable, dependable and somewhat significant ‘stream of wealth’ is simple.
Because I know a secret to doing that. And if you CLICK HERE, I’ll reveal all the exciting details.