{"id":2070,"date":"2009-12-08T13:23:50","date_gmt":"2009-12-08T18:23:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dobermandan.com\/?p=2070"},"modified":"2010-05-08T14:10:04","modified_gmt":"2010-05-08T19:10:04","slug":"affiliate-marketing-sucks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dobermandan.com\/blog\/affiliate-marketing-sucks\/","title":{"rendered":"Affiliate Marketing Sucks"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Tuesday, 10:59 AM<\/p>\n<p>Dear Friend,<\/p>\n<p>Something has been stuck in my craw for a while&#8230; and I can&#8217;t keep quiet about it anymore.<\/p>\n<p>Wanna know what&#8217;s got me all tensed up like a tightly coiled spring?<\/p>\n<p>All these people constantly hitting me up to promote their product launches.<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;re so damn arrogant about it.<\/p>\n<p>First of all, in almost all cases, I make more money promoting my own products.<\/p>\n<p>So what incentive do I have to promote <em>their<\/em> products? In almost all cases there is none.<\/p>\n<p>They never tell me WIIFM. (What&#8217;s in it for ME!) They just expect me to jump on board.<\/p>\n<p>But the thing that REALLY frosts my cute little tush (well, according to my wife it&#8217;s cute) is how these people expect me to just fall in line and drop everything I&#8217;m doing to promote their stuff on THEIR launch schedule.<\/p>\n<p>Look, I&#8217;ve got my own stuff planned and scheduled according to MY schedule&#8230; selling stuff that makes me a helluva lot more money. How incredibly arrogant it is to assume I&#8217;m just going to shove my own plans and schedule aside to promote some affiliate product.<\/p>\n<p>And it&#8217;s getting ridiculous.<\/p>\n<p>There are new product launches almost weekly now. If I agreed to all the deals I get hit up for I&#8217;d never have the time to promote my own stuff.<\/p>\n<p>And once you do it for one person, all your other &#8220;friends&#8221; (who are in reality business acquaintances you hardly know) try to use the friend angle to get you in on THEIR launch.<\/p>\n<p><em>&#8220;You did it for so-and-so&#8230; why won&#8217;t you do it for me? Waa&#8230; waaa!&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Since I&#8217;m killing your precious affiliate marketing sacred cow today&#8230; let me tell you something that will REALLY get your panties in a bind&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Relying on affiliate marketing as a significant part of your customer acquisition or marketing plan is&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Absolutely Bone-Headed Stupid! <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And sooner or later you&#8217;re going to regret it.<\/p>\n<p>Why?<\/p>\n<p>Actually, there are several reasons&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>First of all, 95% of your affiliates will never do ANYTHING!<\/p>\n<p>You&#8217;re wasting a gawd-awful amount of time, money and resources trying to sign people up as affiliates&#8230; and you&#8217;re wasting even <em>more<\/em> valuable resources trying to get them to do something.<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;re not gonna do it&#8230; and you&#8217;re completely delusional to even <em>expect<\/em> them to do anything.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Which brings me to the most important<br \/> reason why affiliate marketing sucks&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>We are direct response marketers.<\/p>\n<p>(Yes, I know you have an exclusively online business.\u00a0 You&#8217;re STILL a direct response marketer. You just stupidly choose to restrict your direct response business to only one medium. I&#8217;ll NEVER understand that, by the way.)<\/p>\n<p>As direct response marketers, the marketing systems we develop are <em>supposed<\/em> to be predictable and reliable.<\/p>\n<p>We should know that investing &#8220;X&#8221; amount of time, money and energy in a campaign will deliver &#8220;Y&#8221; results. And we should be able to get almost the exact same results each and every time.<\/p>\n<p>Now what, pray tell, is predictable and reliable about using affiliates to sell your products?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>NOTHING!<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>One of my friends just lost 90% of his business <em>overnight<\/em> because his biggest affiliate petered out for one reason or another.<\/p>\n<p>Think about it&#8230; you&#8217;re relying on other people for the success of your business. If you truly understood how few people ever do <em>anything<\/em>&#8230; you would be in absolute horror about your dependence on others.<\/p>\n<p>If your business plan depends on your affiliates doing something&#8230; you&#8217;re in big trouble.<\/p>\n<p>I learned something very important recently while going through the process of selling a direct response business.<\/p>\n<p>The systems you have in place that consistently, predictably and reliably bring in customers and sales are what really increase the value of your business to a potential buyer.<\/p>\n<p>A big e-mail list of freebie-seeking moochers isn&#8217;t very valuable to a buyer.<\/p>\n<p>An affiliate program with 3% of them <em>somewhat<\/em> active isn&#8217;t very valuable either.<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;re not stable, predictable or reliable systems.<\/p>\n<p>But a big active <em>snail mail<\/em> customer list that you mail offers to once a month and has a great ROI&#8230; now that is VERY valuable. In fact, THAT is your most valuable asset and is the FIRST thing a knowledgeable direct response marketer will look at when determining the value of your business.<\/p>\n<p>A direct mail promotion with records of ROI when mailed to various lists&#8230; now, THAT is valuable&#8230; AND predictable and reliable.<\/p>\n<p>Your affiliates&#8230; eh.<\/p>\n<p>Your affiliates are just gravy. It&#8217;s great if they bring in some business but you shouldn&#8217;t count on it.<\/p>\n<p>And if your affiliate program is a big part of your customer acquisition, then you shouldn&#8217;t rest until you get more predictable and reliable campaigns and systems in place.<\/p>\n<p>Because you&#8217;re one minor little glitch away from being out of business.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Now I&#8217;m REALLY going to piss some people off&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The reason you have problems like this is because you&#8217;ve been listening to the Internet Marketing gurus.<\/p>\n<p>And they&#8217;re completely clueless about the history of our business. (Except Ken McCarthy of The System Seminar. He&#8217;s a mail order master who has successfully transferred that to the Internet. And one of the very few Internet Marketing gurus who is the REAL deal.)<\/p>\n<p>If you really want to figure out how to most effectively market your products and services&#8230; online AND offline&#8230; you need to study the old mail order masters.<\/p>\n<p>Guys like Gary Halbert, Joseph Cossman, E. Haldeman Julius, the Thomas Hall Direct Mail Guides (Halbert&#8217;s mentor), Ted Nicholas, Robert Collier,\u00a0 Eugene Schwartz, Dick Benson, and others.<\/p>\n<p>The current gaggle of gurus has never even <em>heard<\/em> of those people, let alone STUDY them.<\/p>\n<p>And you&#8217;ve been learning from people who have never taken the time to study the true masters.<\/p>\n<p>Hell, I spoke to a guy recently who teaches online marketing and he said, <em>&#8220;I think I might try some direct marketing soon.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>He&#8217;s a TEACHER of this stuff and doesn&#8217;t even realize he&#8217;s using direct marketing!<\/p>\n<p>So go back and study the mail order masters&#8230; not the &#8220;guru of the month&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>You&#8217;ll be much better grounded in the timeless principles of marketing&#8230; and you&#8217;ll have a much more successful business to show for it.<\/p>\n<p>Thanks for letting me rant a little bit today.<\/p>\n<p>All the best,<br \/> <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-65\" title=\"dobedansig_sm12\" src=\"https:\/\/dobermandan.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/05\/dobedansig_sm12.jpg\" alt=\"dobedansig_sm12\" width=\"150\" height=\"74\" \/><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tuesday, 10:59 AM Dear Friend, Something has been stuck in my craw for a while&#8230; and I can&#8217;t keep quiet about it anymore. Wanna know what&#8217;s got me all tensed up like a tightly coiled spring? All these people constantly hitting me up to promote their product launches. They&#8217;re so damn arrogant about it. First [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,5],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-2070","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-offline-marketing","7":"category-online-marketing"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Affiliate Marketing Sucks - Doberman Dan<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.dobermandan.com\/blog\/affiliate-marketing-sucks\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Affiliate Marketing Sucks - Doberman Dan\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Tuesday, 10:59 AM Dear Friend, Something has been stuck in my craw for a while&#8230; and I can&#8217;t keep quiet about it anymore. 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