Friday, 12:01 AM

Dear Friend,

Happy Friday the 13th!

It's not like I'm superstitious or anything but it might be a good idea to avoid guys in hockey masks today.

(Insert rim shot here… followed by chirping cricket.)

Oooooo-K…

I'm going to get into some of my down and dirty "street level" entrepreneurship stuff today… but first I want to talk about somebody who has been getting on my nerves lately…

No, not any of the online con-men.

The Colombiana.

I think she is the most persistent person I have ever met in my entire life.

Seriously.

I thought I was persistent… enduring nine long years of continual multi-business failures… but I think she's even more persistent than me!

And not surprisingly, because of this annoying persistence… she accomplishes everything she puts her mind to.

EVERYTHING.

In certain cases, it took decades… but she never gave up hope and never stopped trying.

I can count on one hand the number of MEN I've met in my entire life who have that kind of intestinal fortitude.

One time, when she was only nine years old she saw a soccer team from the Netherlands on TV. I guess it was the first time she had really taken notice of a bunch of white guys with blue eyes.

She looked up from the TV and told her parents that when she grew up she was going to marry a white guy with blue eyes.

The whole family laughed. Her dad said, "You're going to have to figure out how you can travel to some other country because you're not going to find any guys like that here."

Hee hee… ha ha.

She kept quiet.

A few years later one of the buses she rode to and from school used to drop her off directly in front of the only Volvo dealership in the entire country of Colombia.

Every day she looked at those shiny new Volvos… and started dreaming of the day when she would have one.

She announced that dream to her family, too.

Now keep in mind, back then the chances of her ever being able to buy even a used Volvo were about the same as her getting hit twice by lightning while winning the lottery… and marrying a white guy with blue eyes.

Again, the whole family laughed.

Her mom said, "Now look here, Sandrita… the only people who can afford cars like that are surgeons and narco-traficantes." (drug dealers).

Her older sister, with all the sarcasm she could muster said, "Ha! I'll have a car long before you can ever even DREAM of getting one!"

I'm not sure if you've ever had a dream or lofty goal that you announced to your family and friends… but in 999 out of 1,000 cases the reaction will be exactly the same.

It doesn't make them bad people… they're just responding the only way a person with a lifetime of "bad programming" can respond.

How else would you expect somebody to respond after decades of being beaten down and told they're nothing but a subservient milk cow whose only reason for existence is to sacrifice their life values to the collective?

Plus I think they really believe they're looking out for you… protecting you from disappointment.

And finally, they don't want you pulling yourself out of the "crab bucket".

Because if you succeed… or even just start to take action to better your life, it's a silent accusation that they have wasted their lives in mindless servitude out of laziness and allowing themselves to be paralyzed by fear.

See, THEY could be taking action toward their dreams and goals, too… if they had any balls.

But they don't.

Instead, they do everything in their power to pull you back down to their level with all the rest of the mindless worker drone sheeple.

Ya know something… I hope to GOD (or Darwin, I guess, if you're an atheist) that your family and friends are different.

But I'd be willing to bet all the tea in China they're not.

Sorry.

SOMEBODY has to tell you the truth.

I experienced it when I first started my "kitchen table entrepreneurship" journey… and it hurt.

Then the hurt turned into anger… and it fueled me on.

But I've learned a better way to deal with this… and this is what I now suggest YOU do.

Don't Tell your Friends And Family NUTTIN'!

Just start taking action to engineer the life you want.

It's better if they don't know about it.

The sad part is you're soon going to have to leave them all behind… and that causes an entirely new set of issues.

But that's an article for another day.

Anyhoo… back to the Colombiana and her annoying persistence.

Now I'm not sure if you've noticed or not… but I'm a white guy with blue eyes.

The chances of us ever meeting were probably 1 in 100 million. (That story involves a crooked webmaster who ripped me off and another one of his clients who was assassinated by professional hit men. Again, a story for another time.)

So even though it took almost two whole decades, the Colombiana checked the "white guy with blue eyes" goal off her list.

The Volvo?

Yup, she checked that off the list several years ago… thanks to the white guy with blue eyes.

In fact, she has enjoyed no less than 8 other cars since then, including a Cadillac DTS, BMW Z4 and BMW 7-series.

And her older sister? A few months ago she just got her FIRST car… a two-door sheet metal death trap that I think she has to wind up with a big key they keep in the trunk.

Geez, this is starting to sound kinda hateful. (Good thing none of her family can read English!)

It's just that…

I Hate The Dream Stealers!

They deserve to be rounded up by evil slave masters, forced to live in pathetic little sheep pens, fed a steady diet of fear and lies… never being allowed to make their own decisions and live life on their own terms… and…

Oh, wait a minute. What am I saying? They already are!

Silly me!

Anyhoo… you have to admit, the Colombiana's persistence is pretty darn impressive.

But sometimes it can get downright annoying.

Especially the last couple months.

See, she has a new goal… and I'm not necessarily feeling this one.

It involves investing in foreign real estate.

Hell, I don't even want to invest in real estate in my OWN country let alone another continent.

Plus, I'm not convinced it's the best timing for that right now.

But I've learned that no matter what I say… or ANYBODY says… she's going to move forward.

Last night she sat down, calculator in hand, Donner the Doberman at her feet and Chiqui the shih tzu on her lap… and figured out exactly how much money she needs to make this deal happen.

And she proclaimed that she is going to make it happen by earning all the money herself. She's not going to hit me up for one single peso.

Ya gotta respect that.

This morning she went exploring employment options… and immediately encountered her first setback.

Her job opportunities are pretty limited because her English still isn't that great… and she can't make the kind of money she needs in most jobs.

Having tasted the rewards of self-employment, she realizes it's the best way to go.

So as of this afternoon she is starting her own business, recruiting employees, doing street level marketing… all this without any help from her marketing "expert" husband… the white guy with blue eyes.

The only thing she asked me to help with is writing a postcard campaign.

I referred her to my recent blog post announcing my new $25,000 copywriting fee.

Hey, I thought it was funny.

She wasn't amused.

So against my own advice, I accepted a spec assignment. (That's a copywriting job that pays nothing up front.)

I simply couldn't say no.

Well, I guess I could have… but then I'd be writing you from Donner's doghouse in the backyard.

Anyhoo… all this got me to thinking about something…

I've heard every excuse in the book from thumb sucking whiners about why they can't start their own business… but the one I hear the most is not having the money.

First of all, if you lived within your means and paid yourself at least 10% of all incoming money, that most likely wouldn't be a problem… but we're going to talk about THAT another day.

Right now I'm going to take away all your excuses for not starting your direct response/online business.

I already gave you a detailed plan right here for doing it with only $200.

But there are people so broke and in debt right now, they can't even scrape THAT together… and if they could, they'd be forced to spend it on keeping the electricity turned on and food on the table.

I feel your pain.

I've been there.

But if you really ARE serious about starting a direct response/Internet business that can change your life in ways you can't even imagine right now… here's a street level entrepreneurship plan for quickly generating the seed capital you need.

First, I'll present you…

The Budget Plan…

First, go dig in your couch cushions and look under your car floor mats for some spare change. (Laugh if you will but I've done it.)

Now go to one of those "Dollar" stores and get the following supplies:

• El-Cheapo brand window cleaner. Investment required, approximately .99 cents…
• Single edge razor blades. Investment required, approximately .99 cents…
• Visit car service waiting rooms (and any other places where people read the newspaper) and grab the USA Today and whatever other newspapers are left there. Investment required, ZERO!
• While you're swiping newspapers at the car dealerships, ask a salesmen for one of those freebie calendars they give away to all the suckers stupid enough to buy a new car. Investment required, ZERO!

Total investment… $1.98!

That's it. That's all you need. We're ready to get started.

Drive to the closest affluent neighborhood and park your P.O.S. car down the road where nobody will see it.

You don't want to target the uber-wealthy "Thurston Howell the 3rd" gated estates… just the nice upper middle class neighborhoods. (BTW, hurry up and do this while there still is an upper middle class.)

Stick with me because your uncle DD is now going to help you raise the capital you need to start that direct response business that can set you free.

And how are we going to do that?

Going Door-To-Door Offering
Window Cleaning Services!

No, I'm not kidding. I'm serious as a heart attack.

(Don't blow me off yet because if you're astute, you'll see there are multiple hidden lessons in this post.)

OK, let's start by crafting your offer.

Pay attention because this is the most important part of your sales pitch…

Today only, since you just had a spot open up in your schedule, you're offering a HALF OFF discount if the prospect allows you to start right now.

I didn't say "50% discount"… I said HALF OFF. That's important.

In addition to your today-only HALF OFF special, you're also offering a…

100% "Pleased As Punch" Guarantee!

After you complete your service, if your prospect isn't 100% pleased as punch with the cleanliness of her windows… she pays NOTHING!

You're doing that so she has no risk whatsoever in trying your service.

This offer I gave you is the part of your presentation you should pretty much say word for word. The rest of your sales presentation will be developed by knocking on about 20 to 30 doors… and getting a few slammed in your face.

If you have a single ounce of salesmanship in your blood, you'll be able to figure out pretty quickly what keeps you from getting the door slammed in your face.

When you get your first "yes" (which will happen fairly quickly with this offer) clean those windows as if your life depended on it. Those windows better be so frickin' clean that birds are flying into them.

Collect your money and thank your new client for the opportunity.

Now pay VERY close attention because what comes next is the most important part of the whole plan:

Whip it out (I'm talking about the calendar, you pervert!) and ask…

"What Day Shall I Put You on My
'Preferred Clients' Calendar For Next Month?
Tuesday the 15th or Thursday the 17th?"

Do NOT wing it here. Do it EXACTLY as I'm saying.

In direct response we call this "continuity income"… and it's POWERFUL.

It means the work you do once will continue to pay you over and over again.

You don't have to start from zero again every month like most other business owners.

Make sense?

Good… because now I'd like to cover the "upscale" version of this plan.

This is for the high rollers who have about $20 bucks to invest.

Get all the same supplies mentioned above. (Although if you found a fair amount of spare change in your couch, you may want to add a squeegee or two.)

You're still missing one more important item if you really want to make the big bucks…

A Brand New Pair
Of White Coveralls!

You'll follow the same plan as outlined above… but things are different now.

You're no longer a "budget" service provider. The minute you put on those bright new coveralls, you promoted yourself to an upscale service provider.

And upscale services charge more money.

So raise your prices!

Same Offer And Presentation…
Just Higher Prices!

Now you'll be able to raise the money to start your dream business a whole lot faster.

Look, I realize window cleaning isn't your dream business. And it's nothing you probably want to do long term.

It's an option… a means to an end.

I've done projects like this in the past. Including the part about having to look for spare change in my couch and car to finance it.

If my back was against the wall and I didn't have any better paying options… I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

I admit, it's not sexy… but if you need money, you no longer have any excuses.

It's not that physically demanding, either. Unless you're in traction or something you could do this.

Hell, I've got a broken L-5 vertebra and three ruptured disks and bones in my lower back putting direct pressure on spinal nerves.

Right now it's a challenge just getting out of bed and staying upright for more than 30 minutes. But if it were necessary to feed my family or accomplish an important goal, I could do this.

I'll tell you something else… I'd rather do a project like this than suck at the public teat. It's not the most glamorous business in the world but at least I'd still have my manhood and self respect.

Onward.

So what do you do with your window cleaning deal after you've raised the capital you need?

If you did it like I told you, you also established a clientele and booked repeat business.

Obviously since you now have the capital to get started you should start on your direct response biz. Duh!

But you've also created a little cash cow there with your window cleaning deal.

I guess you could just ditch it and notify all the people who booked you next month that you won't be showing up.

OR… you could pass it off to a responsible teenager looking to make some extra money. Let him have 50% and you keep the other 50%.

Multiple streams of income that require very little of your time are veddy, veddy good… and if I were you, I'd get as many of those going as possible.

Even a couple hundred fungolas a month from a window cleaning business ain't nothing to sneeze at.

Look, I like talking about direct response copywriting, product development, market research, selling high priced info products… and rolling out your offer on a big scale, raking in millions… all of which I've done.

But I haven't forgotten where I came from.

I'm just a lower middle class guy from Barberton, Ohio with nothing more than a high school education.

I've been broke, living in an apartment with no furniture, unable to pay the rent and put food on the table if I didn't make something happen right away.

I've lived in my car with my dog, too proud and stubborn to ask anybody for any help… when "moving up in the world" meant I had the money to rent a room in a scary flea-bag motel.

And this isn't stuff that happened decades ago… some of it is fairly recent.

This isn't an attempt to manipulate your emotions so I can close you on some kind of $2,000 Instant Internet Push Button Profits program.

The reason I'm revealing this very personal information that's actually quite embarrassing to me… is to give you hope and help point your way.

On my entrepreneurial journey, I've seen very good times… and incredibly bad times, too.

Good times or bad, I've discovered the only person I can ever really depend on to help me is the one staring back at me in the mirror every morning.

Same goes for you, too.

I've been tested time and time again… and can unequivocally tell you without a shadow of a doubt…

Iron willed persistence, guts and the willingness to do whatever it takes… even if it means becoming a lowly door to door window cleaner… THAT is how you'll accomplish your goals.

All the best,