Personalized Hand Written Direct Mail
Monday, 11:47 PM
Dear Friend,
Today you're going to learn the most important secret to success…
Failure!
Yup, when you're swinging for the fences, you're going to strike out… a LOT.
But the secret is to keep getting up to bat, no matter how many times you've struck out.
Believe you me… one home run MORE than makes up for all the strike outs.
And today, I'm going to share one of my very recent strike outs.
I've said it before and I'll continue to say it until you "get it"…
Direct mail is one of the most effective techniques
for generating consistent back end sales…
Here's a letter I sent out to my bodybuilding customers a few months ago promoting a high ticket product.
This really is my handwriting (Yes, I write in all caps.) The actual letter was personalized with the customer's first name and printed on yellow lined paper exactly as you see above.
It was sent in a #10 envelope also addressed in my handwriting.
By the way, if you would like to discover how I turned my handwriting into a font, check out www.fontifier.com.
Moving on…
I really wanted to test a personalized hand written letter to a small list of my best customers. I've seen them work like gangbusters on other promotions but I had never tested one in this particular business.
The letter was sent to a recent list of approximately 1,500 multi-buyers. In other words, customers who had bought at least two different times within the previous two months. (Multi-buyers are almost always the most responsive.)
I had really high hopes for this mailing and was already planning the roll-out to the entire list… but…
It Bombed!
I can't believe I didn't catch it but I figured out WHY it bombed after I mailed it. It was something Gary Halbert told me a long time ago… but in my haste to try something new, it totally slipped past me.
Let's have some fun. Let's see if you can figure out why it bombed. I'll give a free 15-minute phone consultation to whoever gets the right answer.
I'll follow up with another article in a few days and reveal the reason this piece didn't work… and had no hope of EVER working.
Looking forward to your comments.
All the best,
You get me thinking about money being tight, that I may not have enough for "extra" purchases, and I tighten the purse strings before I even think of visiting the website.
For the record, I do not carry a purse. It's a metaphor.
Just a guess…
But a guess is a form of test is it not?
I remember Gary writing that you have to sell a free offer as hard as you sell an actual product and I really took that to heart.
I've had horrible results sending out short letters whereas my own long letters have actually pulled in decent business.
That's my guess.
Courtney
You did not telegraph the offer ahead of time. You should have mentioned in a form of a teaser or hint what would happen "when" they click on the link….
Right?
Hi Mr. Dan – first thing, where is your name at the bottom. I see a signature – but as most signatures, it is not readable. You mentioned to all of us that you wrote and signed this letter, yet when you click on the link, Rick Gray is the author, so now I am confused. Next – The letter's tone is personal, yet it is coming from a business. I would rather see a personal letter coming from Doberman Dan himself, since a business seems cold. Not sure if I like the statement "you can get all the details online at…..". Sounds to commercial, to un-personable. As a reader, I would want the details NOW, not being forced to go to a website too find out my surprise. Your letter gives a website to go to, but the letter does not have any urgency or an expiration date. I now went to the link and got a big red message "offer expired". How many of the readers waited until after March, to go to the link and get their special gift, only to get the same message I did.
BY THE WAY – this was a great posting. Like the idea of posting the letter, getting us involved, wondering what the correct answer is.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but this paragraph doesn't really sit well with me:
Because you've been a good customer and money is tight in this crappy economy, I've put together something special to reward you for your support and continued business.
It's like saying, "hey, the economy is bad, and since you always buy from me, so let me make you an offer so that I can take more money from you!"
Hey – I hope you had help in addressing the #10 envelopes. Not only was that a lot of writing, but putting first-class stamps on 1500 envelopes must have taken forever. Yikes!
Hi Dan:
What do I know? I'm right out on a limb here, how about….No P.S.
Byron
P.S. Always put in a post script….Eh!
Well Dan looks like this to me…
The letter looks less personalized because you
1. Started the top of a "personal letter" with a Headline or "Sales Pitch".
2. Justified the lines.
3. Broke the letter up like a sales letter from a car dealer, but most likely……
4. You made the customer go LOOKING for the offer. To much work and no one wanted to take the time out of their busy day to go to the website.
BUT…
I may have read to DEEP into the cause of failure so I'm full of beans and don't know why it failed!
Dan
I've been on the production end of direct mail for 30 years but during that time, I've read thousands of letters from non-profits to telescope hawkers.
There could be many things that made this piece bomb and testing has to be done one variable (maybe 2) at a time. Just from me as a consumer, I have no real desire to copy that long link into my browser because there is no IMPACT for me to do so.
What's in it for me? You're promising me "something special" but you haven't given me enough incentive to find out what it is.
Rainer
http://dmgraphics.ca
http://directmailinsider.com
P.S. A great P.S. would really help, too.
Hey Dan…
I agree with Bart. There is no reason for them to click on the link. You've got a call to action, but not much else.
But, beyond that since Bart came up with that idea first…here's my guess:
The letter sounds "needy". That is, instead of you having something they want/need, it's reversed. It's giving the customer the upper hand. Don't chase the customer…we want them chasing you!
Are you Rick Gray or Dan? The illegible signature put me off…and then, your web site appears to be fairly impersonal (other than the copy of the letter)…but, who is Rick Gray?
I definitely didn't like the headline and body copy reference to the crappy economy. Got me thinking right away of how little money I have to risk on bigger muscles… Thanks, I'll just go out and cut and stack some more firewood.
When you have the prospects' attention I would grab it and run with it….you just said to go to your web site.
Instead, I would say I have a marvelous free gift (like one bottle free when they buy two) for them…but, they have to hurry since you only have X number of bottles in on a special shipment. Give them some urgency and an order by date!
You made it "personal" with the hand-printed letter effect…why not include a photo of you working out (not too posed) and maybe autographed as well (unless you are a 90 # weakling) : )
Personally, I wouldn't ever order from a hand written note. It is just not professional enough to give me confidence in the company.
A hand written post it note is OK though.
That should do it.
Dave
P.S. My first direct mailing pulled 5% average order rate. Some lists pulled 9%.
Today, with high direct mail costs your best bet is to send out an offer with a very low-priced 30 day trial offer…then use autoship or a continuity month-to-month membership after 30 days.
If you want to see my exact hugely successful direct mail letter just send me an email with Mailing Letter in the subject line.
Dan,
A few things come to mind.
The headline offers the reader no real benefit to read the letter.
You don't have a deadline in your copy
There is no phone number in the letter.
There is no P.S.
Mitch
Dan,
I think this would have been more powerful if you mail-merged the reader's name and the name of the last product he purchased, then the whole concept of a personalized note gels.
My .02.
Scott.
You didn't send it via first class mail?
maybe the headline should of been worked into the letter and explained the offer and act now instead of sending them away from the letter you spent time on.
Without peeking at any of the other comments above…
I don't see any urgency or limited-time offers in this letter.
If I had received this letter (and I have received similar mailings in the past), I would have more than likely stuffed it in a drawer for a rainy day or put it away and totally forgotten about it a few days later.
Now I'll go and read what others had to say.
Kudos Dan for being honest about your bombs as well as your successes. ;0)
You sent them to a website!!!
Phone order might of worked better in this case.
Dan,
This is the second time I've commented on one of your posts. The first time…for some reason, my comment never got posted.
This time…if my browser is correct, it's still awaiting moderation…despite that there have been at least two comments after mine.
I've never said anything negative or tried to post anything that would warrant censorship. So, I guess I have to wonder…am I on your blacklist for some reason?
What's the deal?
Too add to the conversation:
It's "personalized" but not personalized… the underline under the link is perfectly straight. Would someone really underline a link in a handwritten letter?
But the main reason, (I think):
This was said already… but there's no urgency or reason why to "click" on the link.
I'd have to go with the "money is tight" line too.
It looks like the piece didn't work because you didn't specify what exactly what the reward was, its monetary or benefit value to the recipient and you did not put a hard time limit on it – "this offer will absolutely, positive expire in 10 days. No ifs, and or buts. So if you snooze ,you loose"
I really appreciate you participating. You've all brought up some really good points… but so far only one person has hit the nail on the head.
I'll give everybody a few more days to post and then I'll reveal the winner.
Best,
Dan
Apparently you sent this mailing to a direct mail buyers list. Their prefered way of buying is through the mail. Why would you send them to a website?
[IMG]http://i28.tinypic.com/5ra55.jpg[/IMG]
Just in case image tags don't work here:
http://tinypic.com/r/5ra55/3
Dan
You didn't identify yourself in the letter.
"Hi it's Doberman Dan from xyz company here"
And because you didn't the reader is
thinking "Who the hell is this person?"
So assumes it's junk mail. And bins it.
Halbert said you have to identify yourself
in every mailing to your customer base regardless
of how many times you've mailed someone.
Don't make the customer have to think. It's hard work.
We're lazy people.
cheers
Mark
Actually Dan what a great opening line you wrote
for this posting….
"Today you're going to learn the most important secret to success…
Failure!"
It's almost straight from Caples Tested Advertising Methods.
Opening an ad with a Shocker or an Interrupter
of a first sentence.
Nice one!
Cheers
Mark
Hey Dan,
This may of failed. But you learn from your mistakes.
Like Halbert said… "You will achieve succes through movement not through meditation".
Take care,
Bill Jeffels
Toronto
Dan,
I don't know if you ever revealed the winner but based on what you said in the Supplement Millions Video your sending customers to a website, from a mailing, is a no, no. Just a thought.
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